"I am so mad at myself" Kyla said to me on Yahoo. She and I often talked to one another also.
"What for?" I asked.
"I let my friend talk me into breaking up with Stephen".
Oh wow, why was my heart racing so fast? He was just an internet friend. I had a boyfriend. Man, I was feeling dizzy, my legs were shaking.
"Oh really? I didn't even know ya'll were going out" I was glad you can't hear a voice when typing to someone, because I'm sure I wouldn't have sounded as casual as I intended.
"Yeah, we did all this summer, but now that I'm back home I broke up with him. I kinda wish I hadn't", she replied.
I was talking to Stephen on another screen.
"Hey, you didn't tell me that Kyla and you were going out this summer" I said.
"It wasn't a big deal, she asked me out, and I didn't want to say 'no'. "He said back.
That sounded familiar. A lot like my own boyfriend relationship.
"Not a big deal?" I said, " c'mon, I'm one of your best friends, your supposed to tell me these things, so I can be happy for you". Yeah right, happy. I felt like crying, and they weren't even going out anymore.
"Well you didn't tell me Gerald was your boyfriend, HE had to tell me."
"Maybe I just forgot!"
Well, now I couldn't deny to myself that I liked him. The thought of him being with another girl made me sick. Even if she was a friend of mine. He was quite literally my best friend, and I still had never even met him in person.
So I immediately called Gerald and broke up with him right? No. As far as I knew, Stephen only thought of me as a friend on the internet. Besides, Gerald really liked me (I assume). I didn't want to break his heart. I'm sure I would eventually feel the same way about him. Or maybe not. Don't get me wrong, I did enjoy talking to Gerald. But I had more fun teasing him, or trying to change him into someone I would like like. Not just like. (How's that for teenager talk?)
Gerald had come to stay a week with my family that summer, and pretty much confirmed to me that I liked the image of him in my mind, while talking from 3000 miles away, a lot more than I liked him in person. He was a nice guy, just not the one for me.
Yet I still didn't break up with him.
Then finally one day Nola said she was coming up to visit a friend of hers that had recently moved to our area. They had known each other since they were girls. My mom and Brenda (the friend) worked at the same Wal-Mart and had also become friends. (It's a small world huh?)
Since we lived so close they would come see us also.
So Nola and Stephen were trekking up from West Texas to Southwest Oklahoma.
They day they were to arrive, I must have changed clothes 15 times. I wanted to look nice, but not dressed up, lest he think me city girl, pretending to be country. I finally settled on my favorite jeans, one of the only pair I had that weren't boys jeans, and a shirt that had Elmer Fudd on it and said "Wabbit Hunter". Mom had to chase me back to the kitchen to finish my chores countless times that day, as I kept finding myself in front of the mirror. Just in case they were about to pull up.
Then finally, finally that afternoon they showed up. It was an overcast October day. Kinda cool outside. I leaned over the sink to look out the window. Wow, I loved their pickup. I went back to washing the dishes. I didn't want to rush out to the pickup, seeming too eager to meet him, and scare him off.
I heard Mom open the front door and invite Nola in. Stephen was still digging around in the pickup. They came into the kitchen, and I was still leaning over the sink trying to catch a glimpse of Stephen out in the truck. I had never even seen a picture of him...well okay, one. But it was dark, out in the barn, and you couldn't see his face.( This was back before everyone had a digital camera.) Nola came over and said " I see you like Doug's new pickup." Oh yes I did. But that wasn't what I was looking at anymore, but I didn't say that.
I heard Stephen knock on the front door, and Dad invited him in. I was still in the kitchen and couldn't see him. I heard him talking to Dad though. He had a deep voice for his age and a slow West Texas drawl. I only hoped he looked as good as he sounded.
To be continued....muhuhahahahaha.